The care and feeding of geek girls

If you’re thinking about getting your own geek girl or perhaps already have one and find yourself besieged with questions, here is a quick reference guide that covers most of the essential topics.

Choosing your Geek Girl
Congratulations! You’ve decided to take the steps to finding your very own geek girl! Keep in mind that geek girls vary widely in appearance, maintenance,  preferred geekdoms and levels of geekiness. You’ll always want to remember that geek girls are very good at hiding many of their shining qualities behind a carefully crafted facade so be prepared to do some research! Make sure that your geek girl’s preferred fandoms are compatible with your own. For example, if you think that Star Trek is gay then you will want to avoid any geek girls that paint themselves green and dress as Orion Slave Girls, no matter how hot they are. The moment you insult their favorite captain, be it Kirk or Picard, you’ll be watching that cute green ass walk out your door faster than you can say “Engage”.

There are exceptions to that rule in that you may find girls who have a wide variety of fandom loves and are happy to spend time debating you over things such as which is the true horror honcho: Freddy or Jason.

Feeding your Geek Girl
Geek girls have no set diet restrictions except for individual allergies and preferences. You’ll want to make sure to try a variety of foods to determine which they prefer best. They may go through periods of eating nothing but ramen for days. This is often a sign of geek girl spending and you’ll want to watch for new shiny items appearing in their geek collection. Geek girls are often fans of international cuisine, particularly Japanese, Indian and Thai foods. Most are open to trying new things and will quickly make their opinions known about these new foods.

Make sure that you keep an eye on your geek girl as they may often forget to eat regular meals. They are known for getting caught up in projects, geek and other, and simply forget to be hungry. If you see them suddenly become absorbed in a show, fandom or project, ask every now and then when they last ate. If they are unable to remember, bring them some of their favorite food items and place them directly in front of your geek girl. They will almost certainly thank you.

Likewise, geek girls often forget that they are thirsty. Be sure to watch their habits to determine their preferences in drinks. Some stick with water, others enjoy sodas and many geek girls of the southern breed are addicted to sweet iced tea. If you notice your geek girl getting edgy, make sure to provide her with a drink that has a sugar content or some of their favorite foods to bring their blood sugar back to a normal level.

Alcohol is a staple of your geek girl’s diet. You’ll often find that they prefer one type of alcohol (beer, liquor, wine) over the others. A sure way to get a smile and enthusiastic greeting from your geek girl is to surprise her with a bottle/six pack of her favorite alcohol when she least expects it. As a bonus she will almost certainly share it with you.

Grooming of your Geek Girl
As state above, geek girls vary widely in appearance. Their preferred attire may range from dressy to causal to eccentric and various combinations in between. Be prepared to deal with mismatched socks, Star Wars lounge pants and actual bunny slippers, or similar items that may cause embarrassment if they show up at your house wearing such things. Geek girls are often extremely comfortable with their geekiness and have no problem with others thinking they are strange.

Geek girls do prefer to stay clean and smelling nice which is a definite plus! They prefer to take care of their own personal grooming though offering to wash their backs will often result in a grin and an invitation to the shower. If you ever find that your geek girl has shown a sudden lack of interest in her personal grooming, she may have become recently obsessed with something and you may need to offer to run her a hot bath with candles. This will likely snap her out of things long enough to enjoy the treat you have prepared.

Entertaining your Geek Girl
Your geek girl will often be perfectly capable of amusing herself for long periods of time. You may need to provide her with internet access, a computer, various movies or at least a book if you are keeping her overnight or for long periods of time. While your geek girl enjoys being able to entertain herself, please note that if you fail to spend time enjoying things with her she may grow listless and decide that it is time to find a new home. Geek girls do require attention and thrive on one-on-one interaction. Watching a movie with them, sitting on a couch and reading a book while they enjoy one of their own, walking through conventions while holding hands, these are just a few of the things that will make your geek girl glow with happiness. Be sure to interact with them often, not just in large groups but in small one-on-one settings as well.

Getting Closer to your Geek Girl
It is likely that your geek girl may form an attachment to you and express feelings of caring for you. If you find such a situation happening and you do not feel similar attachment to your geek girl, immediately let her know. It is important that you and your geek girl have similar levels of feelings for each other in order to maintain her level of contentedness. If you find yourself developing feelings for your geek girl but are unsure if she is feeling the same, show her in little ways: present her with a stuffed Companion Cube to show she means a great deal to you (please don’t mention the incineration of the Companion Cube unless she knows the game and finds it funny), make a playlist of songs that relate to her favorite fandom and present them to her on a flash drive, Ebay snipe an auction for VHS copies of her favorite old cartoon show that she still talks about, reach out and hold her hand while watching a movie. If she lights up at your gesture it is likely that she returns your feelings.

Know that your geek girl will thrive on attention from you both in private and in public. Unless your geek girl has specifically stated any boundaries, know that hugs, kisses and hand holding are some of the things that make her happiest. If you are embarrassed to show affection to your geek girl in public, you may want to consider letting your current one find a new home and seeking one that you feel more comfortable with. If you are proud of your geek girl, as you should be, let others know. She will reward you with cuddles and consenting to watch some of your favorite geek shows even if she truly can’t stand them.

In conclusion…
While finding and maintaining the right geek girl for you can be a challenge it is also a rewarding experience. Remember that the more care you show for your geek girl, the more she will respond and reciprocate. Be prepared for random days of costuming, her occasional sighs over the Harry Potter novels, debates about Star Wars and Star Trek and other events that may be cause for embarrassment or argument. Keep in mind your geek girl is a passionate creature and as long as you are able to sometimes just smile and shake your head you too can enjoy a long lasting relationship with your personal geek girl.

(this post brought to you by Elf, geek girl 4 life)

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~ by rumielf on November 27, 2010.

One Response to “The care and feeding of geek girls”

  1. Hey!

    I just came across your blog, and I think it’s awesome! You are good with the written word! I will definitely be checking back here regularly!

    If you are interested, check out my blogs, too! I manage two at the moment:

    http://www.aestheticsofthenerdy.wordpress.com deals with finding beauty in the geek, be it video games, comic books, or whatever.

    http://www.antimonopoly.wordpress.com is my newer blog, in which I review underground board games and give my two cents on them.

    Great job! Keep up the good work!

    -Stephen

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